Me, Myself and only 

Muslim friends beware while you sleep

Just read this news in today's times of india and found it worth sharing with all the prospective readers of my blog :) ... It's a real comedy and goes like this:

Talaq in sleep, couple in soup
SILIGURI: A Muslim couple in Jalpaiguri district have been ordered by local religious leaders to separate as the husband allegedly uttered 'talaq' three times in his sleep.

While the couple, who have three children, refused to obey the order since there was no discord between them, the community leaders are adamant that they must separate or face a "social boycott".

Aftab Ansari and Sohela have been married for the past 11 years. However, on the night of December 20 last year, Aftab allegedly uttered 'talaq' three times in his sleep after a tiff with his wife.

The matter came to light when Sohela discussed it with her close friends and soon it reached the ears of the Muslim leaders

The leaders, quoting the Shariat, ruled that the talaq has to be implemented and if it is not acceptable, the only alternative was temporary separation for 100 days during which the wife will live at her father's house and spend a night with another man.

She can remarry her husband only after the man has given her talaq. As the couple were unwilling to accept the verdict, the matter went to the family counselling centre at Falakata police station in Jalpaiguri district.

The counselling centre, attended by judges of the Alipurduar sub-divisional court, discussed the problem in detail on Saturday, but failed to find a solution.

The additional district session judge (second track), Muhammad Abdul Jalil, has directed the general secretary of the Anjuman Committee, Muhammad Abul, to settle the issue, sources in the counselling centre said.

Really hillarious...

That was the version which TOI presented.
Here's my version of the same:

In a village there lived this guy named Aamir. He was a firm believer in his religious beliefs and also obeyed his parents in everything they said. One day he fell in love with this girl named Shaheeda and told his father "Abbu jaan I really love this girl. Her parents are ready to marry her to me provided the two of you give permit me to marry her". Now Hussain (Aamir's father) really loved his son too much as Aamir was the only son in the family of 5. So could not say a no . Besides he knew that Shaheeda's family was one of the most respected family in the city and Shaheeda's father was one of his good companions at the masjid.

Aamir's eldest sister Zia was pretty much jealous of Aamir because of the special favours he recieved from rest of the family. But since Abbu jaan had already put in a yes nobody in the house could dare put in a word. Further Aamir's ammi jaan was also in favour of the marriage.

Finally everything went as good as it could with aamir and shaheeda enjoying their married lives.
It happened one day that Jennifer Lopez appeared in Aamir's dream and as it is common with good looking girls, she had made his life a living hell. One day he saw Shaheeda and fell in love with her... Shaheeda was entirely different from JLo and he enjoyed her company. Now Jennifer started suspecting Aamir of looking forward to another girl and hired detective Ram khilawan to investigate the matter.
Ram Khilaawan being one of the best detectives in town, got some pics of Aaamir and Shaaheeda in objectionable positions. This was enough for Jennifer to get hold of Aamir. She made Aamir captive in a room and started torturing him as well. All this happened for a week or so when Aamir started missing the days he had spent with Shahida. Something happened to Aamir and next time the servant came in to give him the food, Aamir jumped out of his bed and gave a nice kick to the servant. The servant being feeble, fainted immediately. It was a golden chance for Aamir to get out of the grips of Jen. He had always loved her but never expected her to make him captive. He slammed the door of Jennifer's room only to find Jennifer sleeping with one of his best friends Razaq. This was too much for Aamir and he started shouting the word 'talaq' to Jen.
Now after he had said the three words, he was suddenly waken up by Shaheeda calling up wake up aamir... what are you saying ... just keep hold of your tongue ...
Co-incidentally, at this time, Zia was practising for the singing competition and was recording her voice. Now she had got a life time opportunity of hurting Aamir and getting Shaheeda away from his life.

The first thing she did in the morning was to hand over the tape to Raheem Chacha (Raheem chacha was the head of the community in the city). Raheem Chacha was astonished to hear the tape. Immediately a meeting of all the leaders was called and it was decided that Shaheeda and Aamir must part. But Aamir and Shaheeda never wanted to part... neither did their parents.
The only solution that could come to Aamir's father was to ask both of them to leave the house and the city forever and ever. Of course that was just upto the time till all of Aamir's sisters got married. And Hussain and his wife would be visiting them on a regular basis.
Now it's five years since all his sisters got married and now the trick has changed entirely, bcoz now Hussain and his wife stay with Aamir and Shaaheeda.


*** NO offense intended****** This is just my version of the story which TOI had published :)

Rahul